This is a short blog about Egyptians abroad. I don't know what it is, but every time I meet an Egyptian abroad, I remember why I left, well, at least partially. Take this nut case I met in South Beach. Walking with my brother down the strip, speaking in Arabic, we get confronted by Ramadan. Short, bald, Caucasian, the only man on the street with thick gold chains and gold rings, as if he was shooting a rap video, bling and all. Anyhow, Ramadan starts speaking about how he's working "temporarily" for a valet parking company. We nod out heads in appreciation. But for some reason, he was compelled to go into a tirade of how he went all over the world and used to own two towers in Spain that magically fell a part, costing him 735,000 Euros. Then he boasted that he was an illiterate, and that he is the only one from a family of 10 to "make it". All this of course is very believable, and it was just nice seeing another Egyptian in Miami. Until he made up this ludacris story about how he was a "Brogrammar" in Telemundo and how he speaks fluent Spanish and that he won to "Ammy" awards. God.
Or that other Egyptian doctor I bump into every once in a while. Who keeps on preaching about the world from his point of view and every time I say something he has to fire back with an "old saying". Like when I told him I got a GPA of 3.7 he was like, "Man talab al 3ola, sahar al layali" and stuff like that. Hey grandpa, you're only 27 years old. So don't preach. Then there's the inevitable speech about homosexuality and the decadence of American morals.
Or the old Egyptian fart I see at Friday prayers who tells me..."Why did you come to the US? Why didn't you stay in Egypt?", ...well, why didn't you? I wish I had the guts to just shout it in his face...it's none of your business!
I really don't know, why as Egyptians, do we have to act "cool" in front of each other, do we have to pull each other down, and be the first to offer each other all the wrong advice.
Oh well, looks like I'm going to use an old Haitian saying. "When you put crabs in a bucket, watch them fight their way to the top."
